I came across this clip and can definitely relate. As a father of 2 toddlers, I can think of plenty of scenarios where my kids have just transformed normal, easy tasks into the most challenging ones.
Leaving the house and sleeping are definitely ones that have become challenging, but the below examples change the definition of patience.
Bath time – My eldest is 5 and I realise that for 5 years every day, we have bathed him. The same scenario every time – every single time. When you mention the word bath time, it’s seems like his brain automatically tells him to take flight it’s time to make this easy task a not-so-easy task. So he makes a run for it. Of course I have to chase him to get him in the bath, then bath him, dry him, put lotion on so that he can dress himself. This has been happening for more than 4 years, every single day. I despise the person who invented the onesie with more than 12 buttons, which my kids believe that they need to button up themselves. This alone takes 30 minutes. What do I do, I can only stand there and wait.
Now, with 2 kids, patience is no longer relevant. By daughter has developed this new thing that I must open her bedroom door with her head, while carrying her in her towel. My son on the other hand, wants me to carry him so that he can run sideways on the wall. What do I do? I make this happen to get them in their bedrooms and make this experience as painless as possible. Again, patience is irrelevant because it must be done in order to keep the peace.
Going to the toilet – I cannot recall the last time I went to the toilet in private. My kids believe that they need to accompany me and sit and wait until I’m done. The questions I get are probably of the most hilarious and probably a bit too graphic for this blog.
Bedtime – I have mastered the earthworm! I can silently earthworm out of the bedrooms. They both believe that mom or dad needs to be in the room for them to fall asleep. So what do I do, I sit in the room until they fall asleep, but need to time and plan my escape perfectly. I even know where the floor will creak, and avoid these spots like a crocodile. Sometimes I do the tip-toe, and sometimes I do the earthworm. At a certain stage I wanted to install a pulley system to the roof, put a harness around my back, so that when they asleep I pull myself up and out of the room. In one single swoosh! The perfect escape! However, every morning I wake up, I have a kid in my bed, in the middle, sleeping at his best. How he gets there, when he gets there, is still a mystery.
There are plenty scenarios I could mention, trust me plenty and this could become a very, very long read. So I will stop right here.
At home, now, I have all the patience in the world. The only reason for this is because I have no other choice, and just do what they need me to do. By doing this I keep my sanity and the kids stay alive.
Kids change your life, they change the way you do things, they change the way you think, and they change the definition of patience. They practically change everything. But, in all honesty, I would not change what they do for anything. They make life so much more fun!!